Dear Papi

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Dear Papi,
I’m writing this letter as an apology for my unessential behavior. I don’t really know where to start, I have so much to say but don’t know how to begin. I know it's been hard for you when I don’t act right, the worry I have put you through, the pain. This upsetting mess has been so hard for you to put up with.



Why didn’t I respect all your commands or why didn’t I listen to you sometimes even when you sat there and talked to me nicely? I don’t even understand it myself. Why do I do these things that raise your blood pressure, and make you feel hurt. And this sorrow was caused by my selfish and thoughtless behavior.

I can’t very much explain my actions, neither justify why I do them. My excuse would be it’s a generational thing and I copy what I see. I remember you always tell me to be the leader and the best in all my classes.

I’ve lied and hurt you so badly. And I can never take back what I did as much as I wish I could turn the clock backwards and make the right decisions.

You’ve been the only one that has stuck up for me. But, I’ve proved you wrong now. All those times that you’ve been telling me all those things, I just didnt listen and carried on. All that has been going to waste in my head because I was stupid and extremely foolish. But now I've grown up and I promise I will always listen.

You’ve loved me unconditionally, trusted me, and you truly cared for me. Most importantly you’ve worked hard for all my needs and genuinely wanted what’s best for me. I know I’ve lost your trust, but i will try and win it back by always doing what you tell me to do, its for my own good after all. But one thing I also know is that you still love me because if you didn’t you wouldn’t get mad when I do wrong. You wouldn’t punish me when I do wrong. You wouldn’t let me do what I want that’s wrong.

I really want to be like the good and perfect son of your dreams. I do want to earn back your trust, I want to be the person who makes you proud. But when I act sometimes I don’t think about what’s going to happen next, and what the consequences will be, or the hurt and the pain you feel as a result of my actions.

In a flash of my eyes I’ve done wrong and made you angry.

When you ask me how do I feel after I can’t explain them verbally but, to be honest I can write my feelings on a sheet of paper. I can talk all day about a topic but, when it comes to talking about my feelings I take that as a difficult challenge.

I know I shouldn’t be afraid to talk to you about anything but, most times, I just am. Because most of the times that I would come to you is to tell you about the actions I’ve done and it’s hard because I don’t know how to talk about my feelings. I can think about how you will respond and if I don’t tell you now what could happen later.

Whenever I lie to you I feel guilty. And I don’t get a prize for lying I just get the effect from it. I do have good intentions, I do not go about them in the right way.

I love you so dearly, with all my heart and soul, more than anything in this world.

I’ve treated you unfairly, every time I think about it I know it’s not the right thing to do. I don’t really know why I have acted the way I have but, I know that I’m going to find a way to fix it.

I am sincerely sorry for all the sorrow I’ve caused you. I am going to show you how thankful I am to have you as my dad. I am asking for one more chance of your trust and caring to show you that I really and truly mean what I say. I am going to make decisions and I am going to make good ones. I am going to try to be the perfect person. Doing whatever you tell me to do, since it will help me so much in my future. I am asking for your forgiveness for my wrongs and asking for that chance to prove you that I can do better.