REKLAMA
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REKLAMA

Card with Yellow Chick.

Tagi: Chicken, Stars

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A New Year is the chance to start
over with a clean slate.
Too bad my credit card won't start
over with a blank slate.


...............I made you a birthday cake to celebrate,
but I couldn't light the candles.
It turns out the fire department
requires a permit for bonfires.

...............A foolish man tells a woman to stop talking,
but a wise man tells her that her mouth
is extremely beautiful when her lips are closed.

...............1066, 1492, 1776, and…your birthday?
The good news is that they aren't teaching
the date of your birth in history classes yet.
The bad news is that means I don't have
the date memorized. Happy belated birthday!

...............
REKLAMA
A diplomat is a man who always
remembers a woman's birthday
but never remembers her age.

...............Angelina Jolie, Brad Pitt, Kim Kardashian,
Beyoncé, George Clooney & ME!
All the famous wish you a very Happy New Year!

...............New Year's Eve is finally here,
where we can be drunk in public and no one minds.
That's why this is the best holiday.

...............The most fun part about making
New Year's resolutions is breaking
New Year's resolutions.
Can't wait to mess up with you.


...............Girls have an unfair advantage over men:
if they can't get what they want by being smart,
they can get it by being dumb.

...............I figured out, what's the most difficult thing to do.
I think it's the counting of your wrinkles.
It's impossible to find one.

...............
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