REKLAMA
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REKLAMA

Card Nervous Chief.

Tagi: Men, Chief, Censorship

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Don't feel uncomfortable about your age.
We will all one day get as old as you are.

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You will be a little bit older,
a little bit rounder, but still none the wiser.
Happy New Year!

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Girls have an unfair advantage over men:
if they can't get what they want by being smart,
they can get it by being dumb.

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The most fun part about making
New Year's resolutions is breaking
New Year's resolutions.
Can't wait to mess up with you.


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REKLAMA
Someone once said that a true friend
remembers your birthday, but not your age.
I remember both.
Shouldn't that account for something?

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Angelina Jolie, Brad Pitt, Kim Kardashian,
Beyoncé, George Clooney & ME!
All the famous wish you a very Happy New Year!

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Men will spend 2 dollars on a 1 dollar item
that they desperately need.
Women will spend 1 dollar on a 2 dollar item
that they don't need at all.

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A New Year is the chance to start
over with a clean slate.
Too bad my credit card won't start
over with a blank slate.


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1066, 1492, 1776, and…your birthday?
The good news is that they aren't teaching
the date of your birth in history classes yet.
The bad news is that means I don't have
the date memorized. Happy belated birthday!

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Because I'm a guy, I think what you're wearing is fine.
I thought what you were wearing five minutes
ago was fine, too. Either pair of shoes is fine.
With the belt or without it looks fine.
Your hair is fine. You look fine.
Can we just go now?

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